Be prepared – the following is your official warning!

I am not delusional.  People who have known me for years can vouch for that. I just choose to skip to the beat of my own drum. I think “they” refer to it as eccentric – I just think it’s an exciting way to live!  I feel things really big. I see sparkles in light, animals speak to me, the wind whispers secrets and I can feel the vibration of energy like tsunamis. It’s just my nature, my connection with the universe and I am very grateful for it.

I believe in magic. Heck I believe in unicorns!  When I was little, my Dad would gather my sister and I every night under the chandelier (it was a cheap knock off from Woolco) and we would talk to the faeries. We’d tell them our wishes, happy thoughts for our friends and family; we‘d tell them our fears and then go to sleep knowing they were there to watch over us.  I still talk to the faeries; I just don’t have a chandelier, now they live in my squirrel lamp.

I was born into a really weird family. But then who isn’t? Thankfully I too was born weird. As a kid I struggled with language and learning. Happily my magical Dad told me to just make believe and make it up. And so I created a lot of fantastical things in my imagination; people, places and otherworldly and wordily possibilities.  Throughout this blog and most definitely throughout my book you will encounter words that I made up. Dad always said if you say them enough, people will start to use them. There is a glossary at the back of my book to help you unveil my Pattisms.

I suck at spelling. In fact I have no real affection for punctuation, periods or proper prose for that matter. Picture Jack Kerouac meets Dr. Seuss meets Alice in Wonderland and they get drunk. It’s a free-for-all wildly flowing and frolicsome joy ride infused with uninhibited artful expression of verbulation.  The lack of punctuation brings me peace.   So don’t expect it.

I am a life lover.  No, not a saccharine, fluffy Pollyanna-do- gooder type, more of a hard core Heidi marching up the mountain with some friendly goats to keep her company kinda gal.  Point is – I will always choose light over darkness – even when I’m stuck up to my neck in mud. So if positivity, hope and happy thoughts aren’t your cup of sugar beware – because you’re gonna get a big tablespoon of it.

And last but certainly not least because you’re crazy if you think I’m sharing all my secrets (like how to speak snerny berny) – but this much I know is true…everyone is scared, nothing is perfect or should be, and love really does conquer all.  Own you own light.

Well gather around and I’ll tell you a little story!  For those who don’t know me well yet…Elfa is one of my nick names. It was born from my love of faeries, pixies and elfin folk in combination with my somewhat alfa female like prowess…..or what I prefer to call my “Warrior Princess” persona.

Anyhow without giving everything away…in a nutshell, my soon to be famous book  “How to Live like a Chipmunk and Other Tips on Living an Awesome Sauce Life” is a handy-dandy, cut to the chase, tell it to me simple, real life “how-to” guide for all the different situations that life throws at you.

I’ve created over eighty instructional lists for both happy and stressy life scenarios – everything from how to be vulnerable, brave, joyful, confident, and love yourself to coping with grief, anxiety and online dating!   Each and every experience being one I have tackled and gotten my badge for.

Each life situation is jam-packed with smart, sincere, sarcastic and saucy – awesome saucy, that is – sensibilities that are true to the core and straight to the point. Eleven points to be exact. Eleven because 10 steps are doable and one for good luck.

Inspired by the practical and productive panache of a chipmunk and driven by my lust for lists, my intention is to provide you sure-fire ways to tap into possibilities and choices on this adventure called life.

I’m crossing my fingers, toes, arms, legs and eyes that it will spark a smile, debunk the ordinary, amp up the extraordinary and offer up options to live your most Awesome Sauce life.

There’s tons more to share, and I promise I will, but for now I just wanted to give you the 101 on what to expect – but if you know me you should expect the unexpected!  I’ll go into more detail and even let you in on some of my secrets and tricks, trip-ups and happy endings as we wait together for this dream to come true.

I started writing this book 4 years ago, but in truth it’s my lifetimes’ worth of living and learning that I’ve put to paper.  The manuscript has been handed off to the Publishing Gawds and will be “loved & petted” for a month or so before we’re able to hold it in our hot little hands!  So until then, let’s have some awesome sauce fun and celebrate all the good things to come!

The hardest thing is to start. But once you do, once you take that first step and get off your butt, there’s no turning back. So I will take inspiration from what started over 3 years ago when my life coach suggested I write out a simple step- by- step way to work through a little issue I was struggling with…that exercise is what ultimately lead me to write my book.  So whatever it is you want – just start.

1. Stop stalling, shilly-shallying, dilly-dallying, schlepping, procrastinating, postponing, prolonging and putting it on the back burner.
2. Ask yourself WTF are you waiting for? A fricking sign? Permission? An invitation? Visitation?
3. Relinquish perfection – nothing is ever 100% ready.
4. Something is better than nothing. Hence the phrase “it’s a start”.
5. Slay your fear of failure.
6. Engage in the power of momentum – aka Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah!
7. Replace lethargy with legendary.
8. Guts + gumption + get-up-and-go = glory.
9. Pull a NIKE and Just Do It!
10. Way to go! Reward yourself for doing it! (Chips, red wine, newfound fame).
11. Listen to Buddha! “There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth”…not going all the way, and not starting.”

Lift the veil! It’s time to celebrate!  The ink is almost dry and I am very excited to share some awesome sauce news!

I have written a book!  OMGAWD!  A real live, hold-it-in-your-hands, turn-the-pages, or watch-it-on-your-screen book!  A book that will help get you through your days; make you smile, laugh, think, feel and hopefully present a plethora of possibilities and choices that lead you to an awesome sauce life!

My book is called…”How to Live Like a Chipmunk and Other Tips on Living an Awesome Sauce Life.”  Feel free to take a breath!  I know – it’s a mouthful, but like I always say – Go BIG or Go Home.

The funny thing is the book itself is a super simple how-to guide for managing all the different things that life throws at you. There are over eighty instructional and enlightening lists for both celebratory and challenging life scenarios; everything from how to handle a bad hair day and broken heart to how to be the best you. Oh and the simply awesome part is each scenario is simplified to eleven steps to follow; my logic being, ten steps are doable, and throw in one more for good luck!

To celebrate this super cool endeavor and to share it with you and the world, I’ve created this space to play in, to share inspiration, giggles, and contemplate all that is possible in this Awesome Sauce Life!

So jump in and join me on this amazing adventure. It’s sure to be full of sparkly magic, kaleidoscopic insight, bold mind boggles and a heck of a lot of saucy shenanigans!

In the words of my favourite storyteller….

“Oh the places you’ll go! There is fun to be done! There are points to be scored. There are games to be won. And the magical things you can do with that ball will make you the winning-est winner of all.”  – Dr. Seuss, Oh, The Places You’ll Go!