Rant.

rant

So last week I was happy (and I still am this week) but man oh man do I every feel like I need a good rant…you know just let go of a few mumbling, festering, pestering, itching, scratching, bubbling on the tip of my tongue gotta be said for the love of GAWD so I can be free again and continue to skip in my happy place….prepare for lift off!

Please move to the back of the bus.  There is no reason to conglomerate in a sweaty tight mass of baby carriages, back packs, and shopping carts within the first 2 feet of the bus ESPECIALLY when there are 30 feet of free space just a few steps ahead of you.  And when I ask ever so nicely “hey friends, can you please take a few steps back” and you ignore me, so then I have to get my Monster Voice on and growl at you like a herd of deaf water buffalos – to please move your butts or else I will have to push through you all, and lead by example.  Thank you TTC…you are now free to go on your merry better way.

Hello over-flowing toilet at 3am in the morning…while I am still in a zombie –like state of dopiness.  Why after over 5 years of living with you did you all of a sudden decide now would be a good time to flush me up with a rebellious tsunami of disgusting water rising at the speed of a flash flood?  What am I supposed to do first?  Save my fur children from impending drowning? Put my clothes in case I slip, fall and bash my head and have to be found naked? Shall I run downstairs and tear apart the cardboard barrier to the basement (aka kitten death chamber) in search of a plunger and bucket while your waves overflow onto my floor?   Or maybe I’ll just wiggle that thingy in your tank and pray to the toilet GAWD for a miracle.   Oh blessed thingy be.   Thanks to my co-worker the next morning for the 101 on over flowing toilets and bringing my attention to the turn off valve.

Excuse me please but I would like to share a lesson in etiquette with those people who have not have the good fortune to be schooled in the manners of class, courtesy and civil breeding.   When asking someone to extend the consideration of a favour – especially one of due absurdity…it is wise to preface your proposal with “please”….otherwise there is a gosh darn good chance of some not so polite repartee coming your way. Bless you.

And finally…gentlemen of the online dating forum….when writing your profiles of grandeur (and delusion), it may be wise to consider your truth.  Even though you are dashingly handsome, can write like Cyrano de Bergerac, have every single considerable thing in common with my wish list…the fact that you live in the woods as a squatter in Toronto might be something you want to share upfront before I fall madly in love with you.  WTF…you live in a tent?

Ahhh  that feels so much better!  World…carry on!

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Be happy.

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I conducted a little experiment last week. I decided I was going to be happy if it killed me; and I was going to make this happen by being happy.  As my Mum use to say “happy is as happy does”. I focused on this goal and took every opportunity to think happy thoughts, say happy words, be aware of happy moments, sing to the birds, chat with the squirrels and even be friendly to grumpy TTC drivers!  And if ever in my day I was faced with the choice to be frustrated, angry, sad or mad – I chose happy!   I was so fricking happy I was giddy!

All giggles aside…I am serious. This little experiment turned into a really big revelation.  Ready?  When you’re focused on happiness you can’t help but be happy!  Ta Da!!!!  Ok now we all know I’m no Pollyanna Doris do good – I’ve got my moods and swords, but after a few rounds in the “beat me up and down for the count ring”, I really wanted to shift my paradigm. I made a conscious effort (aka pinky swore) that from the second I rolled out of bed and put my feet on the floor I’d smile, then I’d tell my three adorkable fur kids I loved them, smother their perfect little faces with kisses and scratch their bums. Then I would squeal in a high pitch kitten voice “who wants breakfast?” as the four of us tumbled down the stairs in elation I broke into singing the “yummy yummy in my tummy breakfast song”, which changes daily depending on what flavour of kitten food we are trying, but in case you want to try it on your fur kids or small humans, it goes like this:  “ Oh yummy yummy in my tummy tummy – super yummy delish chicken and gravy morsels are going into your perfect potbelly tummy” sung to the tune of Paradise by the Dashboard Lights. I know – I’m talented.  So test one – success!  Conscious happiness works on cats!

Next humans!  I left my house, admired my beautiful fall kissed garden, listened to the birds and said hey to a local squirrel and got instant affirmation that my local wildlife were digging the happy vibe!   My next experiment – bus stop people – da da da dum.  As I arrived at the bus stop the usual grumpola suspects were frowning and moaning in unison, then a guy rode up on his bike and was waiting for the light. He looked at me (probably cause I’m kinda cute) and I blurted out “well aren’t you just the happy bike guy”.  He looked at me as though I was crazy, so to comfort him that I indeed was not crazy – I repeated myself “you know it’s a beautiful day, you’re on your bike, you have a great smile – I just thought you should know!”   Honest – I wasn’t trying to pick him up – I was just sharing some happiness.  Then he took his foot off the pedal and looked right at me and said something that just explodiated my heart.  He said “thank you, you’re right, it is a beautiful day…I’ve just been so sad for so long I forgot to notice. Thank you so much for that, it really made my day”.  And he gave me a big smile and rode off.  Gosh that made me happy!

Give it a try. Being nice, being thoughtful, being generous, being kind, being happy is really quite easy and when you share it…it comes back tenfold.

Have a happy day xx

Shanks.

gtg

Thanks giving.  Giving thanks.  Either way you slice the turkey it’s about being grateful for all the blessings, lessons, giggles, jiggles and wiggles we have in our lives. And not just because it’s the big bird day, or it’s the polite thing to do; it’s about being aware every day and in every way to see and think about our lives in a gosh darn holy shit we are fricking lucky…even when life isn’t perfect (imagine that).

Being grateful puts everything in perspective. Like my Mum said – “it can always be worse”. Feeling gratitude helps us to focus on what we have, not what we don’t and creates a playing field of deep understanding, appreciation and humility…all which lead to being happy ( and man oh man am I ever grateful for that!).  Being grateful is also a conscious choice – to choose not to complain but instead be satisfied, to look at the bumps as lessons, to see our experiences as gifts and not take them for granted and most importantly realize the value that every day brings. Once we start to see the vastness of our lives, the fortune of our possessions, the magic in moments, the feasts on the table, friends in our circle, opportunities in our path – we begin to see just how good we got it.

So count your blessings. Literally. Write them down every day, say thanks to the TTC bus driver – even if he’s snarky.  Say thanks the chill of fall and grab your favourite sweater; say thanks to the gorgeous flavour of buttertarts and the softness of Sadie’s insanely fluffy fur!  Say thank you bumps and bruises – you make me stronger and give a big fat shout out of thanks to those who test you and push you – for they help you to realize that even in the dark there are pockets of light.

So without further adieu…Just saying thanks!

Thank you for my health, mind, imagination, creativity, family & friends, Angus, Pagan, Charlie, Sadie & Alfie; my senses, laughter, hope, trust; my home and cottage, my job & coworkers; the ability to travel, the Zen of sewing, puttering in gardens, playing with squirrels, chipmunks, birds & bugs, thank you for ample food and water; for extraordinarily delish food and whisky, wine & plain ripple chips. Thank you for freedom, peace, democracy, magic,  nature, my river, forests, faeries; friends who drive me places, perfect blue steak, birds singing, lady bugs, dragonflies, and even toads.  Thanks you sunny day with a crisp fall nip in the air, Freddy the squirrel eating his peanuts and chattering back with thanks.  My harvest is so full.

Tucking the faeries in.

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It’s that time of year. The time I have to say so long to summer and all my forest friends in my magic woods.  It’s bittersweet; but they need to rest as do I. We need to harvest the moments, give thanks and crawl under the blanket of winter to sleep and awake again next spring.

The river will slow down, the moss will collect; the trees will shed colourful tears as the earth is adorned in ornaments of decay. The forest sways to the bitter kiss of wind’s farewell. My furry and feathered friends enjoy a last hurrah as they reap their harvest for a long winter’s keep.

It’s time to go. The veil is being lowered. Sweet dreams faerie friends, I will tuck you close to my heart so you won’t be far.

Nature’s Voice

She has a voice.
Sweet and serene.
It rustles her canopy and warms her footing,
It plays with ripples and rocks, while dancing in the light of her moon.

A cheer for the new day.
A prayer for the end of a season.
Songs of birth and sorrow.
Hear her whisper and scream.
Give audience to her laughter and longing.

A conversation with one or many, who choose to listen.
A secret language, spoken one breath at a time.
Nature’s native tongue.
Listen closely for it is music to your soul.